Cam's Pencil

I look at my youngest boy, Ben. He's 11.5 years old and all boy. He likes to show me his latest boo boo. Bruises from head to toe reflect the hardcore outdoor play. My 2 youngest boys are always tossing the football, doing the latest flip and trick on the trampoline, or just wrestling on the couch. I usually bust them up if they get too rowdy by asking them if they are snuggling again. That gets all the "ewww gross" and giggles enough to break it up for a momentary break.

Little boys have dreams and goals that change as they age. I think at some point they all want to be a fireman... policeman... soldier... pilot... truck driver... athlete. Currently Ben wants to be a Major League Baseball player. We don't shoot down his dreams by telling him you've never played a day in your life on a real team. We don't shoot him down for anything he may dream. We smile and listen as Ben uses his little boy pencil to write out things he wants to do and be. He can easily erase and try again if he wants to. All little boys come with a pencil. Dreaming is an amazing part of childhood.

My son-in-law, Cam, had a pencil. He is an outdoorsman. He loves hanging in a hammock in the trees, kayaking, swimming, fishing,... just being one with nature. My sweet little grandbaby that he helped bring into this world, Rory, has fully taken after her father. She loves being outside. Any colicky crying fit, and she has had PLENTY, can be stopped with a quick trip to the porch. Her pencil is currently writing and dreaming of the next snack, boob sip, tug on Duke's tail, facetime with me, or trip to the porch.

Cam's pencil is the point of this blog post. As I think of him constantly this week.. I choke back the tears looking at my Ben while thinking of Cam's pencil being taken from him at 12 years old. Someone robbed him of innocence and dreaming. Someone replaced his pencil with a permanent Sharpie. His life was immediately, permanently marked with alcohol at 12 years old. That Sharpie mark caused a ripple effect that rippled through his life for many years and left a mark on my family.

Cam made the decision this week to finally admit he is an addict and checked himself into rehab on Sunday. Cam is in a place where he can find healing from the permanent marks in his life left by addiction. He is getting his pencil back. He never really got the chance to finish his little boy dreams. He never got to finish writing his own story. He didn't know he could. The label and scars left by that permanent marker and all the consequences that go along with addiction have followed him until Sunday. Sunday, he took his life back. He took step one.

I am very proud of my son-in-law. He doesn't even realize he is also writing the testimony that will belong to my daughter, granddaughter, and new baby on the way. He is making a huge, difficult step. The rewards are amazing and endless.

I looked forward to reading Cam's new story of redemption. It's never too late.

#CamsPencil

Conversing

My kids were telling a neighborhood kid about Jesus yesterday. They get so excited. I am amazed at the atheists that enjoy this conversation. It definitely draws people... for good reasons and contrary reasons. If your religious conversation doesn't draw in the curious then maybe you need a new conversation. Every kind of people you can think of was drawn to Jesus. If you are only surrounded by people who agree with you and are never controversial or questioning then you are not challenged or growing in Him. You are stagnate. And don't even try to label it "persecution" if someone disagrees with you.

#detox #crushyourbox #askquestions #invitequestions

Record Keeping

Think about this series of questions.

1. Do you believe love keeps no record of wrong?
“Love is patient and kind, not jealous, not boastful, not proud, rude or selfish, not easily angered, and it keeps no record of wrongs.”
1 Corinthians 13:4-5

2. Do you believe God is love?
“Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love.” 1 John 4:8

3. Do you believe God keeps a record of your wrongs?

#detox #thingsGodneversaid

Why so demanding?

In times of turmoil we can have peace in the emotional storm. In times of literal storms we can have peace also. It's not so much demanding "peace be still in Jesus name!" but it's the comfort in knowing He is here with me always, regardless of the storm. ✌🏻#detox

We don't get it.

People idolize Justin Bieber and the Kardashians and Lady GaGa and Regie Hamm... I could go on. 📝

Fan girl. Sing all their songs. Watch all their shows. Read all their books. Buying the tshirts.

It doesn't equal relationship. We know this.

Fan girling worship on Sundays. Singing all the hymns. Watching all the sermons. Reading all the devotionals and inspiring books. Buying all the religious gear.

It doesn't equal relationship. We don't know this.

#detox

I hear You calling...

I've been searching for things I didn't know were searchable. Questions I always had that were dismissed as "we can't and don't know." Then I find a trail I was drawn to full of tiny answers that exploded in my mind like the most amazing expression of love and realness and fullness. I found a quiet place in the path to stop and think about everything. Process time. I needed a break from all the information that I know I still haven't fully comprehended. Weeks later with friends seeing what I'm seeing.... I took a huge leap and went into uncharted deep water. I needed to know. I had to know. It wasn't acceptable not to know any longer. I felt led to read. The book called to me from the basement totes. I had read it before. I needed to read it again. I never went to dig through my totes. I could still feel it pulling me. We went to the Goodwill for Allie to spend birthday money. Danny and I just roamed around playing with stuff. I glanced at the books to see if I saw anything educational. There it was. Screaming right at me like a love note begging to be ripped open and read with absurd anticipation. The book. I bought it for $.50.... saved myself the trouble of digging through my totes. My mind is blown. Reading this book with new eyes. It's a completely different book. It's gospel. Amazing news. His mercy is literally new every single day. I am overwhelmed with His presence that I can't explain it. In Him I move, breath, and have my being. Totally free. I have everything I thought I had been missing. Pieces I needed to continue down this path. I'm ready. Let's go! Let's go! The journey is grand!!! It is NOTHING like I was told. It's more. So much more. #detox #rambles

Think about it...

"I’m paging through a travel magazine that features safaris in Africa. The pictures are stunning… and normally I would find these images very engaging, yet I skim through the magazine with little interest. The reason is simple: I’m sitting a few feet away from a campfire overlooking a vast african landscape. The magazine is thrown to one side as I notice the elephants that have just arrived at the watering hole, about 50 meters in front of us. Being in the middle of this experience renders the magazine irrelevant."

#detox #idols #profound #relationship