Cam's Pencil

I look at my youngest boy, Ben. He's 11.5 years old and all boy. He likes to show me his latest boo boo. Bruises from head to toe reflect the hardcore outdoor play. My 2 youngest boys are always tossing the football, doing the latest flip and trick on the trampoline, or just wrestling on the couch. I usually bust them up if they get too rowdy by asking them if they are snuggling again. That gets all the "ewww gross" and giggles enough to break it up for a momentary break.

Little boys have dreams and goals that change as they age. I think at some point they all want to be a fireman... policeman... soldier... pilot... truck driver... athlete. Currently Ben wants to be a Major League Baseball player. We don't shoot down his dreams by telling him you've never played a day in your life on a real team. We don't shoot him down for anything he may dream. We smile and listen as Ben uses his little boy pencil to write out things he wants to do and be. He can easily erase and try again if he wants to. All little boys come with a pencil. Dreaming is an amazing part of childhood.

My son-in-law, Cam, had a pencil. He is an outdoorsman. He loves hanging in a hammock in the trees, kayaking, swimming, fishing,... just being one with nature. My sweet little grandbaby that he helped bring into this world, Rory, has fully taken after her father. She loves being outside. Any colicky crying fit, and she has had PLENTY, can be stopped with a quick trip to the porch. Her pencil is currently writing and dreaming of the next snack, boob sip, tug on Duke's tail, facetime with me, or trip to the porch.

Cam's pencil is the point of this blog post. As I think of him constantly this week.. I choke back the tears looking at my Ben while thinking of Cam's pencil being taken from him at 12 years old. Someone robbed him of innocence and dreaming. Someone replaced his pencil with a permanent Sharpie. His life was immediately, permanently marked with alcohol at 12 years old. That Sharpie mark caused a ripple effect that rippled through his life for many years and left a mark on my family.

Cam made the decision this week to finally admit he is an addict and checked himself into rehab on Sunday. Cam is in a place where he can find healing from the permanent marks in his life left by addiction. He is getting his pencil back. He never really got the chance to finish his little boy dreams. He never got to finish writing his own story. He didn't know he could. The label and scars left by that permanent marker and all the consequences that go along with addiction have followed him until Sunday. Sunday, he took his life back. He took step one.

I am very proud of my son-in-law. He doesn't even realize he is also writing the testimony that will belong to my daughter, granddaughter, and new baby on the way. He is making a huge, difficult step. The rewards are amazing and endless.

I looked forward to reading Cam's new story of redemption. It's never too late.

#CamsPencil